Ask Mark Ward

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Feel the Burn.

Today, I awakened with a deep sadness. I cannot equate it to anything in particular. It is simply my demeanor. One of the most valuable lessons that I have learned is to make peace with discomfort and allow it. I do not need to judge it, resist it or even understand it. I can simply allow it to move through me, knowing that this too (like all things) shall pass.

That said, I am very clear that it is my job to manage my feelings (rather than allowing them to manage me).  For me, this means that I will honor and even respect the sadder moments of life, but, with a specific guideline.  I actually hold myself accountable by committing to a "schedule" upfront.  I will sleep, eat an embarrassing amount of ice cream, listen to sad music (get ready, Adele!), cry on the shoulder of a good friend (whatever it is within my means to do to honor the feeling), but, ONLY FOR A SCHEDULED AMOUNT OF TIME.  I may allow 2 hours, 4 hours or a full day. Once the allotted time is up, I'm done! It is time to pick myself up, release the sadness, get reacquainted with all of my blessings, raise my vibration and get back into my life.

Life is not always going to feel good to us and that is OK. Yes, if the feelings of sadness are perpetual, there is a possibility of depression, chemical imbalance, etc. In those cases, it is vital that you seek professional help. For those temporary bouts of sadness, however, sometimes it is best to  simply get out of the way. Instead of subjecting yourself to analysis ("why is this happening? what's wrong with me?") or resisting the discomfort (by pretending that everything is great), allow the sadness to move through you, knowing that you will not break. Resisting will simply energize, ignite and magnify the sadness. What you resist, persists.

Life is a rich experience. When you are able to detach from what it "should be" and allow it to be as it is (and appreciate it in that capacity), it is all the richer.